Romance in Asia: Where East Definitely Does Not Meet West

By Jamaica Layne

I recently returned from a trip to Southeast Asia (Hong Kong, to be exact).  My husband is originally from there.  And no, he’s not a British colonial, either.  He’s a native Cantonese man, and though he’s very Westernized in many ways (and a naturalized American citizen, too), he has a very different way of looking at the world---and romance---than the way that I, a Westerner (and a romantic Irish girl at heart) do.

Indeed, what is considered romantic in Asian culture is quite different than what we Westerners would call romantic.  Asian cultures (and the Chinese in particular) are very, very pragmatic people who often have no use for trivial things like romance, at least in the Western sense. 

To give a very personal example of what I mean, my Chinese husband proposed marriage to me by unceremoniously dumping a binder full of diamond investment research in my lap. How did that happen, you may ask?  A few months into our relationship (which became very serious, very quickly), I asked the proverbial question, “So, um, honey, where do you think this relationship is going?” (I had just come out of a short live-in relationship that had ended in complete disaster, and therefore had decided not to invest unnecessary time and energy in any relationship that didn’t seem have a long-term future). In response to this, my husband got red in the face and very flustered.  He balled his fists, then stomped off into the other room.  He returned carrying a fat green binder full of computer printouts, which he then dumped into my lap.  With that, he said, “Well, I’ve been doing some research, and a decent engagement ring costs at least $10,000!”

I stared at him gape-mouthed for a moment.  Then I responded, “Is THAT your version of a marriage proposal?”

Apparently so. Not only that, proposing marriage by offering a detailed inventory of valuable material goods (i.e., a “bride price”) is standard in most Asian cultures.

To illustrate what I mean, take a look at these photos. What you’re seeing here is real 24-karat gold jewelry and statuettes.  (That’s PURE gold, just like the gold bullion locked up at Fort Knox; most Western-style gold jewelry is not 24K gold, because pure gold is actually quite soft and fragile, and therefore not practical for wearing as jewelry because it gets damaged too easily).

This incredibly gaudy, fragile (not to mention EXTREMELY expensive) jewelry and decorative stuff is offered to Asian brides by the groom and/or his family as part of her “bride price.”  Sometimes the gold isn’t even given to the bride herself, but rather to her family (specifically, her father) as a dowry of sorts, but in many Asian cultures it becomes the bride’s personal property---outside of the marital property---which serves as a sort of insurance policy for her in case of divorce or widowhood (in most Asian cultures and countries, widows do not inherit any of their deceased husbands’ property; rather it goes to her husband’s next oldest male relative instead).

These jewelry and solid-gold figurines are not meant to be worn or displayed.  No, they’re intended to serve purely as an investment, which can be liquidated in case of emergency.  Presenting the bride price to a bride is a groom’s way of saying, “Look kid, don’t worry, you’ll be taken care of no matter what.”  Not only that, the Chinese spend a great deal of time on matters of “luck,” such has consulting expensive astrologers for “lucky” days, months and/or years on which to get married.  These “lucky” days/months/years are tied directly to the Chinese lunar calendar and zodiac; indeed, I was in Hong Kong on Easter Sunday (Easter is also tied to the lunar cycle), and saw dozens of wedding parties out and about in the city that day, since under the Chinese calendar Easter Sunday was a very “lucky” day on which to get married.  Unlike the West, where people try to avoid getting married on the same day as others, people in China go out of their way to get married on the same day everybody else does (picking an obscure day for your wedding isn’t considered smart there at all, quite the opposite). Everything is planned wayyyyy in advance in these cultures---even sex (people actually consult astrologers on the best days on which to conceive a child, or even go into labor, and get busy/induce their labors accordingly).

The lack of spontaneity in Asian courtship customs might seem very abrupt and un-romantic to us, but once you understand the motivations behind them, they can become quite romantic indeed.  Don’t most women at heart want a man to take care of us and make us feel secure?  And what’s more security-inducing than a valuable pile of gold that belongs to us alone? (Or a binder full of diamond-investment analysis that shows just how much time and energy, not to mention money, a man is willing to devote to making an important purchase----your engagement ring, likely the most valuable gift you’ll ever receive?)  You have to look beyond the impersonal-seeming surface and spend more time thinking about the intangible, unspoken reasons behind these regimental and overly materialistic-seeming gestures.  When you do that, you realize that what might seem completely unromantic and sterile on the surface is actually more romantic than any cheap bouquet of roses or flattering words could ever be. 

Writing in First-Person, Present Tense: How TENDER IS THE KNGHT Breaks All the Writing Rules

By Jamaica Layne

Congratulations to commenter Maureen B. Johnson for winning Jamaica's book giveaway!

Do you remember all those “rules” your high school English teacher taught you? Like, “don’t start a sentence with because,” “don’t write in the second person/implied second person,” “avoid sentence fragments,” and most of all, “always use the past tense”? Chances are you heard more of the same once you were in college, and maybe even in advanced creative writing classes if you’re a writer yourself. Other common “don’ts” among creative writing teachers include “don’t head-hop” (i.e., switching between the points of views of difference characters) and “don’t tell your story out of chronological order.”

Why do these rules exist at all? And moreover, why do they exist when many well-known authors break these rules all the time? (Nora Roberts frequently “head hops,” Stephen King is fond of sentence fragments, and the great master William Faulkner frequently wrote stories where the events unfolded out of chronological order. ) And we can never forget Jay McInerney’s runaway 1980s bestseller Bright Lights, Big City, possibly the only fictional work ever successfully written in the second person.

The reason these writing “rules” exist is because the vast majority of writers, whether they are green students or even well-published professional authors, simply lack the necessary skill or talent to get away with breaking them. Most writers who attempt to pepper their prose with sentence fragments or odd point-of-view choices simply will end up writing badly. Remember the old adage, “you’ve gotta know what the rules are before you break them?” In other words, you need to master the overall craft of writing the “normal” way before you even attempt to do something that’s not normal.

Case in point: my current Decadent release TENDER IS THE KNIGHT is written in the first person, present tense. Every writing teacher I ever had (as well as several editors) have all shouted DON’T WRITE IN THE PRESENT TENSE from the rooftops. Writing good fiction in third-person present tense is difficult (and unusual) enough, but first-person present tense? Virtually unthinkable. Writing convincingly in the first person is already a challenge (you and your writing essentially have to take on the personality of your main character, not an easy thing to do), so why muck it up even more by making it present tense?

And yet, when I was working on early drafts of TENDER IS THE KNIGHT (which I originally wrote in the past tense) I kept getting the nagging feeling that the present tense was the right choice for this particular story. The main character, Lisa Smith, is immersing herself in a completely new world (the Society for Creative Anachronism, a historical reenactment group) that involves virtual time travel, political intrigue, and a whole new set of social rules. The early drafts in the past tense just didn’t seem to work. Then, one day I was plugging along in the manuscript, and unconsciously switched from writing in the past tense to the present. I was a couple pages in before I noticed what I’d done, but once I figured out what happened, I went back and read what I’d written that way---and found that I’d finally found a way to make my story work!

By switching to the present tense, I was able to have the reader experience exactly what Lisa was experiencing in real time. The story suddenly had a lot more impact. I immediately went back through the rest of the draft and rewrote it in the present tense, and found that the novel was the better for it.

Granted, it wasn’t at all easy to do. I really had to re-align the way I approached the whole book. I had to constantly check and re-check my writing to make sure that the plot I crafted made sense in the present. I also had to alter how my characters reacted to things. Instead of reflecting back on something that happened in the past, they were reacting to everything in real time. It added an increased level of urgency to everything.

Luckily for me, I’d already written several successful novels and had a publication resume out the wazoo before even attempting to write this way. I have a feeling if I’d done it with my first manuscript, I’d have failed miserably.

I myself had read books written in first-person, present tense before (examples include John Updike’s Rabbit, Run and Audrey Niffenberger’s The Time Traveler’s Wife), so I knew it wasn’t an impossible feat. But I knew it was very, very hard to do, and I also knew that to do so might interfere with my ability to get the book published. (My own literary agent even says never to do it unless you REALLY know what you’re doing.) And never having done it before, I wasn’t entirely sure I knew what I was doing. Nevertheless, I sent the novel to my agent for her feedback.

To my pleasant surprise, my agent told me that TENDER IS THE KNIGHT was the only first-person/present tense manuscript she’d ever read that actually worked. She shipped it off to publishers almost that same day, and I had a publishing contract offer within a week. (My editor at Decadent also said it was one of the only times she’d ever read a manuscript written in first person present tense that worked. High praise from a seasoned editor!)

So, here’s the takeaway. It’s okay to break the rules. Just make sure you know what you’re doing first.

Jamaica is giving away a copy of Tender Is the Knight to one lucky commenter. Leave a comment for a chance to win!

Meet Jamaica Layne & Enter a Contest!

Greetings, Jamaica Layne, thanks so much for sitting down with me for a chat! Do you enjoy tea or a pint of ale?

Both. I drink lots and lots of tea, especially now that I've given up my longtime vice of chugging way too much Diet Coke. I'm not a coffee person, and soda is off-limits, but writers need caffeine to survive! So I drink lots of tea (hot and iced). I also like a pint of ale from time to time. I especially enjoy drinking home brewed beers. I know a lot of people who do their own brewing.

You have a wonderful new novel, Tender is the Knight. GREAT title, by the way, and your cover is gorgeous. What inspired this quirky and gorgeous tale?

I was inspired to write a romance novel set in the world of the Society for Creative Anachronism (SCA) for two reasons. One, I love the romance genre, and two, to me there's no more romantic time than the Middle Ages and Renaissance. The SCA allows modern-day people to escape the modern world in their free time and travel back to the world of knights and ladies. The SCA also sparks many real-world romances, including many marriages of people who wouldn't otherwise have met. The plot of this book was inspired by several actual people who met and fell in love at SCA events. What's more romantic than that?

Indeed! What sort of Hero is your character?

The hero of this book has two names. In the SCA, he's known as Sir Phillip Reginald of Whitestar, a Knight of the Midrealm and the favorite to become the Middle Kingdom's new King. In the modern world, he's Phil Dawson, a pharmaceutical salesman. Like many people, he uses the SCA to escape the modern world and become a different sort of person than he is in everyday life. He's dashing, romantic, chivalrous, and mysterious.

Ohh, he sounds delicious. Did your involvement in SCA inspire your career in any way?

Oh, absolutely. I don't think I would have become a writer if I hadn't grown up in the SCA and met all sorts of interesting characters, not to mention learning a great deal about history.

What is the very best thing for you about the world of Renaissance Faires and Highland Games?

I think it's the "chivalry," courtesy, and courtly love. People become very polite and gracious, and have a lot more grace and respect for one another than they do in the modern world. And men tend to hold women up in reverence, as they did in past eras. It's all part of the romance of the Middle Ages.

Do you enjoy the dress of a lady, or are you a happy tavern wench?

Well both, sort of. My SCA persona is of an educated middle-class person who is in royal service as a teacher and scribe, so I am never garbed totally to the hilt like the heroine of this book is, since I'm not interested in becoming a Princess or Queen. I have more comfortable "wench" garb that I wear when I'm working on crafts or camping. But I also love beautiful clothes and own several fancy outfits fit for a gracious lady. I tell people in the SCA that my fancier clothes are "hand-me-downs" from the noblewomen I work for, since as a servant I could never afford to purchase silks or velvets. My favorite "lady's" garb is a blue velvet Flemish ensemble trimmed with yellow satin and welted pearls. (And I made it myself!)

OH! Talented and creative in many ways, then. If you could actually inhabit the world of one of your books, would you? And which book would you choose?

Oh, absolutely. You could argue that I already inhabit the world of TENDER IS THE KNIGHT, since it's set in the SCA and I'm active in the SCA. But I've also written several books set in the "real" Middle Ages, and I'd love to travel back in time to inhabit those worlds for real. The act of writing historical fiction is almost like living history in itself.

Knowing as much about history as you do, what is the thing about being a modern woman that you are most grateful for?

Flush toilets! (Though technically, the ancient Romans also had those!). And antibiotics! I wouldn't be alive today if it weren't for modern antibiotics.

Jamaica, thanks so much for stopping by and sharing a some time with us!

DON'T FORGET! Decadent Publishing is having a SCA Contest! Click HERE for more details!

Have a Wild Wednesday with...

JAMAICA LAYNE!

Hi there all you great readers in Decadent-land! Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Jamaica Layne, Romance Author Extraordinaire. For more information about me and my books, visit www.jamaicalayne.com. I've written and/or edited almost 20 different books and anthologies in the erotic romance and historical romance genres for such publishers as Virgin Cheek/Random House, Ravenous Romance, and Silver Publishing, among others. And now I'm branching out into contemporary romance with my first book with Decadent, TENDER IS THE KNIGHT.

This book began its life over 25 years ago, when I joined the Society for Creative Anachronism (www.sca.org). Or rather, when I was forcibly dragged to my first SCA event, Pennsic War 13, by my father who had just recently joined SCA via his new girlfriend. For those of you who don't know, SCA is a historical reinactment organization that specializes in the Middle Ages. It has chapters worldwide and over 100,000 worldwide participants. It's on a par with other historical reinactment groups that focus not just on daily life but also military/war in history, like those groups that specialize in the American Civil War, for instance. So in addition to getting dressed up in medieval clothes, eating medieval food, and dancing medieval dances (seriously!), one of the SCA's chief attractions is its tournaments and wars, which feature swordplay, jousting, even large-scale battles involving hundreds (sometimes even thousands) of armored fighters.

One of the SCA's other guiding principles is the recreation of the "ideals" of the Middle Ages----including romance, courtesy, and courtly love. After spending most of my life active in SCA in one form or another, I learned a great deal not just about medieval history (which led to my love of history in general, as well as my future career as a historical fiction writer), but about you guessed it, ROMANCE. And a few years ago, when I was just getting my romance writing career in full swing, a thought occurred to me----what if I set a romance novel in the romantic world of the Society for Creative Anachronism?

When I first joined SCA back in the 1980s, the historical reinactment world was very tiny---and also regarded as "weird" by most people, since many participants in both SCA and other historical societies like it were also into offbeat things like Dungeons and Dragons, science fiction novels (indeed, science fiction writers like Marion Zimmer Bradley and Robert Aspirin were among SCA's founding members), sword-and-sorcery comics, computer games, and other realms of geekdom. But as time went on, living history groups began to enter the mainstream. Renaissance faires began springing up all over the country and became quite popular with the masses. Dungeons and Dragons and computer gaming, once the denizen of nerdy geeks with no social lives, was replaced by massive-multiplayer online roleplaying games like World of Warcraft, which is played by everyone from teenagers to Hollywood celebrities. Movies set in and around the Middle Ages, like Ridley Scott's KINGDOM OF HEAVEN and ROBIN HOOD to fantasy films like the Lord of the Rings trilogy, made the romance of the Middle Ages front-and-center in popular culture. Would a book set in a fictional version of the SCA---with all its oddball characters, historical foibles, modern-day knights in shining armor, and medieval romance---be a big seller?

My agent thought so. But when she shopped it to the major NYC publishing houses, they all turned it down. While they liked the book, they didn't think it would find an audience. So, enter Decadent Publishing. Decadent saw the huge potential market for TENDER IS THE KNIGHT among both the living-history/recreation set and mainstream history buffs, and agreed to publish it---first as an ebook, then in print. Since I'm already a veteran of the ebook romance marketplace, I jumped at the chance. And I've been very impressed with the professionalism of all of Decadent's staff, including its editors, who have provided some of the most thorough editorial support and feedback I've ever received in my career.

TENDER IS THE KNIGHT features a modern-day heroine, Lisa Smith, who is bored with her dull workaday life as a factory forewoman in Dayton, Ohio. When her best friend Pegeen introduces her to her new hobby (the SCA) Lisa is skeptical at first. But soon Lisa meets Sir Philip Reginald of Whitestar, a sexy SCA Knight and the local favorite to become the local SCA "kingdom's" next King. Lisa soon gets caught up in the swashbuckling romance of it all----but soon finds herself in way over her head. Will she reach her fairy-tale ending? Buy the book when it releases October 29 at www.decadentpublishing.com and find out!