Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Growing Old Gracefully - NOT!

  by Maureen O. Betita

I think it hilarious...think she knows everything because of her age? Nah, as you age you realize you know nothing, you just have more experience knowing that!

I wrote that. It was in an e-mail. I love when I spontaneously come up with something that triggers a blog topic for me.
Aging. Yup, we’re all doing it. Sorry, unless you stumbled on that sexy vampire…birds gotta fly, swim gotta sing and together we all age.
Is it true that wisdom comes with age? Eh. Experience comes with age. That I can believe! What sorts of experience? Well, good stuff, bad stuff, blue stuff, true stuff, fake stuff…it’s all the same. It’s all experience. It’s all in how you use it.
And in how you view it.
I view it with a great deal of humor. If I were given a chance to live my life over, I wouldn’t change anything. Sure, I remember and know all the things I did ‘wrong’ but if I corrected those things, warned myself…I wouldn’t be who I am now and to be frank, I like who I am now.
I didn’t always.
Yes, I might like myself more. But…I doubt it.
I love to write about experience and what characters with experience do. How they react, how what they know, or think they know – aha! – effects them. And there is nothing like writing about romance and passion with characters thinking they already know everything they need to know. Though, personally, I think like I stated before. That the more you know, the more you don’t know.
I do think, with the right attitude that adventures are best with experience behind you. In fact, that experience creates the best adventure.
How does that sound? It’s one of my new writing mottos! After all, I write characters that certainly should have enough experience to manage adventures… My first published heroine is 53! The first I ever wrote is 45.
Sure, I wrote a few shorts with younger characters, but my first love is writing generation babyboom.
Yes, I’m a boomer. But I’m on the bare edge of the boomer generation. Born in ‘59, statistics put me solidly into boomerhood. As a native Californian, where trends move like lightening, my first ten years were more deeply ingrained into the 60s then the 50s.
My brother was born in ‘49, same month as I. He and I are very different in perspective and experience. Granted, he was a boy in the 50s. I was a girl in the 60s. But according to the statistics, we’re both boomers.
I once took a class on interpersonal communication that stated this: The first ten years of your life is where you develop the core of how you relate to the world.
Hmmmm. I’m a 60s girl!
That, I believe!
And how I love to write characters who think the way I do, with all the foibles and faults and conceits that surely saw me screw up. And will see me screw up many times in the future, I’m sure!
Life. I love it! ;-) Even the growing old part. Though it isn’t with grace, it’s with gratitude.



Maureen said...

Morning, Decadent! You were wonderful at RT!

Author Leanne Dyck said...

Welcome home.
Great post!
I too am a boomer.
Where were you in '62?
I was bawling my eyes out after a slap on the bum.
Menopause. Many dread it, but, so far, I'm loving it.
Finally, I'm starting to understand who I am. : )

Maureen said...

Wow, Leanne...you're a beat poet!

In '62? Probably being tormented by my older sister... ;-)

P. Kirby said...

I'm, ahem, about a decade behind you. At this point, I still write characters who are in their twenties or younger. But my own experiences certainly inform how I write about love at that age. In particular, my writing romance is flavored by the knowledge that relationships evolve. A relationship needs more than perfectly fitting naughty bits to last. As a reader, consequently, it takes a lot to convince me that a couple is really going to have a HEA.
The first ten years? That would be the 70s, for me. Although, honestly, the 80s were my decade. I really don't remember the 70s.

Maureen said...

Pat - I don't really remember the 60s, but I know how much it influenced me as I grow older and consider how I think about life. Those first ten years we are very impressionable, even if we aren't aware of it.

As for the HEA...that really starts after the wedding or moving in together, etc... I wish more books would cover all of that!

Anonymous said...

Maureen, lovely post again.

I agree with you. I also wish people would write to the 'daily grind' and find some love, conflict, and joy in that aspect of a love life as well. Diana Gabaldon comes to mind as someone with success in that area. Being of the happily married crowd, I think it would be fantastic to read a story that continues after 'I do' and shows a wonderful LIFE story!

There you go. WRITE it, girl! :-)


Kathleen said...

I enjoy resding books with older characters. Their past makes them who they are. The path we choose may be bumpy, but it makes getting older interesting. I was a teenager in the sixties, and it was wild. I Loved it!

Maureen said...

Heather... I have! Just need some major editing and clean up, but you'll see them... ;-)

The Bandits were quite impressed that you visited the Lair, btw!

Kathleen - I'm all for some romance for the rest of us not-twenty, not-skinny, not-single crowd. Though, wait...you're skinny! Go away! ;-)

Ursula Sinclair said...

Great post! And why on earth should we be graceful about it. I prefer to seriously voice my displeasure.

Maureen said...

Yeah, I like how growing old gracefully has come to mean just fading away without complaint.

Screw that.

Let's dance our way to the century mark...no, let's boogie and slam dance!