Be My Friend

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By Stephanie J Grace

Any given day, I can look around my world (in my home, in my town, on the internet, in social media) and find some amazing people I’m proud to call ‘friend’. I am in awe of the women, especially, who walk through my life and allow me to walk in theirs. Sometimes I look around and say, “What the heck do they see in me?” Now, I’m not fishing here. I know I’m pretty cool, but I can be humbled by the quality and integrity around me. The friendships I’ve nurtured sharpen me, and make me better.

However, nothing is ever perfect. For friendship blips that have tripped me up, I’ve finally started listening to the advice I give my daughters in concern to friendships.

**The term ‘best friend’ is reserved for family. Throwing it around in any other situation is means to cause upset. The fact that a friendship has blossomed and grown between two people is amazing enough, no need to quantify it.

**Friends of friends do not need to be close. Larger groups who enjoy each other’s company are bound to form break off friendships that grow at different speeds. This can be so tough, because I think it’s easy to fall into wanting to please everyone and wanting to be ‘fair’. Being loving and open to friendships as they form, deepen—or even drift apart—is the only thing you can do.

**Be kind. Egos are fragile things and all too often, life is hard. Also be kind to yourself. Don’t overanalyze everything. (I have a bad habit of replaying conversations in my head, “Did she take that as I meant it? Was I as honest as I could be—how exaggerated was that story? Will it bite me in the ass? Jeez, why do you do that when you get excited!) As the song says, let it go.

**It’s okay to be in different economic places. No need to break out the paystubs, but it’s okay to say ‘playdate at the park’ over a day at the amusement park if it’s just not in the financial cards at the moment. In my daughter’s case, I remind her not every day can be ice cream truck day. There’s nothing wrong with grabbing freezies from the freezer instead.

**Don’t hide your true nature. If you’re basically a goofball, it will come out eventually. Some personalities don’t enjoy the goofball type, and it’s best to know and respect that from the start (we’re cool with the goofball type—pretty sure it’s hereditary).

In Felinesand Flowers, Warren and Wendy are colleagues, but the friendship is there. I love Wendy’s confidence—it makes her a better friend to Warren, especially when he’s so unsure. The couple are one of my favorites. The springtime story of love and renewal and joy really lights my heart.

Felines and Flowers

By Stephanie J Grace

During high school, Warren was just Wendy’s youth pastor. All grown up and shepherding over her own flock of church kids, Wendy Miller turns to her old friend for help. Not that Warren is that old. In fact, the two have a lot more in common than Wendy would have ever thought.

After the death of his wife, Warren was sure he was finished with relationships. Wendy changes that forgone conclusion with her bright spirit and zest for life. Lining up their desires when they’re at very different points in their lives proves a challenge that might take a little divine intervention, or at least help from friends.

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I’d love to give away an e-book of Felines and Flowers. Please leave a comment with your favorite friendship advice. Be sure to leave your email address, so Decadent can send out the winner’s book.

All the best,

Stephanie J Grace

www.stephaniebeck.net

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